I just fell asleep, old man style, and had this crazy 30-second dream.
I was laying next to this beautiful naked woman (well, naked except for a garter on her right thigh) and we were edging towards the beast with two backs when she suddenly looked up and through the window of the cottage we were in.
“Oh my god! Manet is here!” she wailed.
“Monet?” I said.
“No, fucking Manet! Look! He always travels in those carriages with the slidey doors,” she replied.
Sure enough, I looked through the small window and, yes, there was a train outside and a carriage painted a bright, lush green whose door was sliding open.
“Fuck!” she said as she slid off the bed hurriedly and threw on a silk dressing gown.
And the moral of the story: even in my DREAMS my brain hates me and won’t let me have sex.
What chance do I have IRL?