In the instant I was unaware
I actually became aware
I don’t know if it was emotion
Or the flu virus in my body
Fucking with my brain
But I saw her letter

Everything looked strange to me
I’d try to look at something
And the outlines would shimmer and jump
Like a badly tuned telly
Back when you actually tuned tellies

In one of these jumps
I saw her letter
Nestled in the draw where it’s been for years
So long that I stopped seeing it
Familiarly invisible

As my vision strobed and my head hammered
I opened the letter and read her words
Hiding from me for 24 years
A clear warning from that past
And this future
A fragile Möbius curl of insane improbability
We should never have started trying to reckon the edges

And yet…

And then

I understood.

Today, I am better.