Rambling In The Morning

Fruicy Juit
9 out of 10 Cortinas prefer the flavour of Juicy Fruit

Well, it’s 5.38 and I don’t think I’m going to get any sleep tonight. Er… last night. Yesterday. Today?

I seem to have come over a bit asthma-y wheezy. It’s not bad, just enough to have completely stopped me sleeping. I was dog-tired around 3am but didn’t drift off because I couldn’t relax: I had to consciously breathe. My lungs sound like a bowl of Rice Krispies.

There’s no particular point to this post apart from giving me something to do while I wait for the day to start properly. Looks like it’s going to be grey and rainy. But while I’m here…

We were talking about how kids take things literally. I remember being that age. In some ways the world was more magical because of my literalist misunderstandings. For example: every time we went on a family trip when I was little, my Dad would stop at a garage and say, “I’m going to get some chewing gum for the car.”

Even now, whenever I see a packet of Juicy Fruit, I think of it as being the gum that cars like to chew.

Red Spider Mite
Hello, I’m a red spider mite. I’m not in your blood, I prefer housebricks and tasty plants

I also used to study tiny insects a great deal when I was tiny(ish). I was fascinated by the miniscule creatures I found on bricks, bright red dots, so petite that they seemed to be perfect Platonic points of red. I clearly remember someone calling them ‘blood bugs.’ Aha – so these creatures must be what blood was made out of! What a fascinating discovery! I must have trillions of these scarlet marvels skittering around inside my veins. I was quite disappointed when I found out it wasn’t so.

Tumbles of misunderstanding like that flow through my early memories. I suppose they’re a feature of everyone’s childhood. As a grown-up, they make me smile and I remember the wonder of misapprehension and the rather dull embarrasment of reality. I was silly! I wouldn’t ever be that literal and gullible now. Oh no.

But every now and then, when I cut myself shaving, I stare at the blood on my fingertip and long for it to move.

Just a tiny bit.