What Every Front Page Today Should Say

Independent Front Page

Above is a front page image from The Independent today. There is no other news item as important as this. And yet…

Where is the coverage? I switched on the various news programmes this morning and it was the usual fluff about prisons, obesity and footballers. What the fuck is going on?

Think of the 655,000 people we’ve murdered. Leaving aside the utter horror, the absolute evil of that act, what does that crime entail for us, just in terms of bad karma?

Oh, but I forget – we’re the civilised West. We’re not ignorant Muslims, forcing our women into veils. We liberate them by slaughtering them instead, with our torture chambers and cluster bombs.

Yes, if only all those Arab countries were as noble and progressive as we are! We must teach them what true civilisation means!